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Pregnancy is the miraculous journey where you create life while your body seems bent on driving you crazy. From morning sickness to bizarre cravings to that waddle you can't shake, it's a wild nine months that's best gotten through with a hefty dose of humor.
Nothing puts those relentless mood swings and awkward experiences into perspective like the wise, these funny quotes about pregnancy are the comic relief you need when you're feeling anything but a glowing goddess.
So grab a ginger ale to settle your stomach, put your swollen feet up, and get ready to LOL through some of the most amusing, uplifting pregnancy quotes and one-liners about this crazy miracle of life. We've got rib-ticklers guaranteed to make you feel seen and less alone on this often insane adventure.
Funny Pregnancy Announcement Quotes
Announcing the news of your pregnancy is a big deal, and injecting a bit of humor can make it even more unforgettable. Here are some funny pregnancy announcement quotes to share the exciting news with a laugh.
- "I grow humans. What’s your superpower?" — Unknown
- "Eating for two, but drinking for none." — Unknown
- "We’re going from a party of two to a zoo." — Unknown
- "Guess what? I’m in the middle of a science experiment. We’re making a human!" — Unknown
- "Our family is growing by two feet!" — Unknown
- "We have a secret to share… I’m not fat, just pregnant!" — Unknown
- "The stork is on its way with a special delivery." — Unknown
- "We’re expecting a tiny new roommate." — Unknown
- "Bun in the oven, due to arrive soon!" — Unknown
- "We’ve decided we need a bigger house because we’re expanding the family." — Unknown
- "Even miracles take a little time (and labor)."
- "Every superhero needs a sidekick!"
- "Bun in the oven! Bake at 98.6°F until (due date)."
- "Eating tacos for two!"
- "From fur mama to baby mama"
- "We cooked up a family recipe!"
- "Looks like “Netflix & chill” went too far!"
Funny family quotes can help capture those light-hearted experiences, making your announcement a joyful and amusing way to share the news.
Funny Pregnancy Quotes For Dad
Dads-to-be also deserve a bit of humor as they prepare for fatherhood. These funny quotes about pregnancy highlight the lighter side of the journey.
- "If you think dads can’t multitask, wait until you see one holding a baby while watching TV." — Unknown
- "Behind every great dad is a kid who thinks he’s hilarious." — Unknown
- "Dads are proof that even the most serious man can be a goofball for their kids." — Unknown
- "Expecting dads: redefining their version of a ‘night out’ since day one." — Unknown
- "Dad tip #1: Don’t mistake the baby’s bottle for your coffee cup. Both are essential, but for different reasons!" — Unknown
- "Parenthood: when you’re more excited about a diaper discount than a new gadget." — Unknown
- "Get ready, Dad. The next nine months are a rollercoaster, and you’re not even tall enough for this ride!" — Unknown
- "From beers to bibs, welcome to the ultimate dad transition." — Unknown
- "Pro tip for new dads: Keep calm and carry extra wipes." — Unknown
- "The first diaper you change is like your first job interview – nerve-wracking, but you’ll get the hang of it." — Unknown
- "Prepare yourself, Dad. You’re about to become the family’s human burp cloth." — Unknown
- "From toolboxes to diaper bags, dads are the ultimate handymen." — Unknown
- "Remember, Dad: If you can assemble a crib, you can handle anything. Even a blowout." — Unknown
- "Congrats, Dad! You’re about to find out that babies don’t come with an instruction manual." — Unknown
- "Get ready for fatherhood, where the only thing you’ll be building is a mountain of diapers." — Unknown
When announcing your pregnancy, dad quotes can bring a funny yet sincere tone to the occasion.
Funny Pregnancy Quotes For Instagram
Sharing your pregnancy journey on Instagram? These funny quotes for pregnancy are perfect for your posts and will surely get you some likes and laughs.
- "Bumpin’ along this pregnancy journey one craving at a time." — Unknown
- "I’m not fat, I’m just pregnant... okay, maybe I’m a little fat too." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: the only time when you can eat and grow at the same time." — Unknown
- "Does this baby make me look fat?" — Unknown
- "I’m in love with a human I haven’t met yet." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: where ‘glowing’ means sweating profusely." — Unknown
- "Can’t wait to meet my little kickboxer." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: because you can’t keep a good baby down." — Unknown
- "Growing a tiny human is exhausting, but totally worth it." — Unknown
- "Future mom: napping for two now." — Unknown
- "Baby loading… please wait." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy is nine months of getting the seat to yourself." — Unknown
- "Bumpin' my way through life. Literally!" — Unknown
- "Pregnancy glow… or just excessive sweat?" — Unknown
- "Proof that miracles come in all shapes and sizes." — Unknown
- "Can't touch this bump. It's a no-poking zone." — Unknown
- "You know you're pregnant when tying your shoes becomes an Olympic sport." — Unknown
Funny pregnancy quotes for Instagram convey the joy of your journey. Blend these with baby girl quotes for a charming post.
Funny Pregnancy Quotes For Facebook
Facebook is a great platform to share your pregnancy news and updates with friends and family. These funny quotes about pregnancy will make your posts stand out.
- "Pregnancy: the ultimate excuse for taking more naps." — Unknown
- "Whoever said pregnancy was a beautiful journey was probably a man." — Unknown
- "Feeling like a superhero, but without the cool costume." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy cravings are just baby’s way of asking for snacks." — Unknown
- "Making a baby is all fun and games until you can’t see your feet." — Unknown
- "I’m not sure who’s more excited, me or the ice cream." — Unknown
- "Baby on board, emotions all aboard!" — Unknown
- "Growing a human: the only job you can’t take a sick day from." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: giving me the best excuse to eat extra fries." — Unknown
- "Creating a mini-me, one craving at a time." — Unknown
Funny pregnancy quotes for Facebook add humor to your announcement, and a hint of baby boy quotes can make it extra special if you're expecting a little prince.
Short Funny Pregnancy Quotes
Sometimes, short and sweet is the way to go. Here are some short yet quotes on pregnancy funny you need to know.
- "Pregnancy: where you pee yourself laughing... literally." — Unknown
- "Bumpin’ along." — Unknown
- "Eating for two!" — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: the only time you’ll love a belly this much." — Unknown
- "Bun in the oven." — Unknown
- "Glowing and growing." — Unknown
- "Baby brewing." — Unknown
- "Growing a tiny human." — Unknown
- "Kickin’ it with my bump." — Unknown
- "Belly laughs." — Unknown
- "Tiny kicks, big dreams." — Unknown
- "Future mom vibes." — Unknown
Short funny pregnancy quotes keep it lighthearted while sharing the excitement of your journey, and baby quotes add a touch of sweetness to the humor.
Funny Unplanned Pregnancy Quotes
Unplanned pregnancies can come with a mix of surprise and humor. Here are some pregnancy humor quotes to lighten the mood.
- "Oops! Guess we’re parents now." — Unknown
- "Surprise! We’re adding another mouth to feed." — Unknown
- "Unplanned but oh-so-loved." — Unknown
- "Life’s about to get a whole lot more interesting." — Unknown
- "Unexpected, but totally welcome." — Unknown
- "Well, this is a plot twist." — Unknown
- "Surprise! We’re growing our family one by one." — Unknown
- "Just when we thought we had it all figured out…" — Unknown
- "Unplanned, but definitely not unloved." — Unknown
- "Oops, we did it again." — Unknown
- "Life’s full of surprises, and this is the best one yet." — Unknown
- "Sometimes, the best things in life aren’t planned." — Unknown
Funny unplanned pregnancy quotes can lighten unexpected news. Match these with new baby wishes to create a positive outlook.
Famous Pregnancy Quotes Funny
Even famous people have their humorous takes on pregnancy. Here are some best funny pregnancy quotes from well-known figures.
- "Everything grows rounder and wider and weirder, and I sit here in the middle of it all and wonder who in the world you will turn out to be." — Carrie Fisher
- "People always say that pregnant women have a glow. And I say it’s because you’re sweating to death." — Jessica Simpson
- "Being pregnant is an occupational hazard of being a wife." — Queen Victoria
- "A ship under sail and a big-bellied woman are the handsomest two things that can be seen common." — Benjamin Franklin
- "Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside." — Rita Rudner
- "It’s a great thing about being pregnant, you don’t need excuses to pee or to eat." — Angelina Jolie
- "If you want to know the feeling, just take your bottom lip and pull it over your head." — Carol Burnett
- "There is no way out of the experience except through it because it is not really your experience at all but the baby’s. Your body is the child’s instrument of birth." — Penelope Leach
- "Pregnancy is a process that invites you to surrender to the unseen force behind all life." — Judy Ford
- "I’m never as happy as when I’m pregnant. I literally would have 10 babies if I could!" — Tori Spelling
- "Pregnancy is getting company inside one’s skin." — Maggie Scarf
- "When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog, ‘Fetch!’" — Bruce Lansky
Funny Congratulations Quotes Pregnancy
Congratulating someone on their pregnancy can be done with a touch of humor. Here are some funny congratulations quotes.
- "Congrats! Get ready for the world’s longest game of charades." — Unknown
- "Congratulations! Let the sleepless nights begin." — Unknown
- "Welcome to the club of constant worrying and endless love." — Unknown
- "Congrats on your upcoming tiny human!" — Unknown
- "Prepare for lots of crying, and the baby will do some too." — Unknown
- "Cheers to new adventures and midnight snacks." — Unknown
- "Welcome to parenthood: where you’ll need a vacation from your vacation." — Unknown
- "Congratulations! Your new alarm clock will arrive in 9 months." — Unknown
- "Get ready for a whirlwind of diapers and sleepless nights." — Unknown
- "Congrats! Your baby is a future source of endless joy and exhaustion." — Unknown
- "Welcome to the club of never-ending laundry." — Unknown
- "Congratulations! Time to turn that spare room into a nursery." — Unknown
Celebrate the big news with humor through funny congratulations quotes, and follow up with heartfelt baby shower wishes to cherish this special time.
Funny Early Pregnancy Quotes
Here are the best funny pregnancy quotes that capture the unique challenges and amusing moments that accompany the initial stages of pregnancy.
- "First trimester: when napping becomes your new best friend." — Unknown
- "Morning sickness should be renamed all-day sickness." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy hormones: turning normal women into superheroes one day and villains the next." — Unknown
- "The first trimester: where you can fall asleep anywhere, anytime." — Unknown
- "Early pregnancy: when your cravings make no sense to anyone but you." — Unknown
- "Congratulations, you’re now hosting the world’s tiniest houseguest." — Unknown
- "Early pregnancy: where every day is a surprise adventure for your stomach." — Unknown
- "First trimester: where hiding your pregnancy is harder than keeping a secret." — Unknown
- "Pregnancy: when even your food has to be baby-proofed." — Unknown
- "Early pregnancy: the only time when eating crackers in bed is acceptable." — Unknown
- "Welcome to the first trimester, where everything smells weird and naps are essential." — Unknown
- "First trimester: when your body decides it’s time for a nap, no questions asked." — Unknown
First born quotes with a funny twist can perfectly capture the anticipation of welcoming your first child, making your announcement both heartfelt and amusing.
Funny Pregnancy Poems
Poetry can add a whimsical touch to the pregnancy journey. Here are some funny pregnancy poems to bring a smile.
- Ode to My (Slightly Stinky) Feet by Leigh Anne Tuohy "Swollen feet, oh what a sight, fitting shoes is quite the plight!" — Leigh Anne Tuohy
- The Mumper by Ogden Nash "Double chins, and beached whale grace, pregnancy gives me a brand new face!" — Ogden Nash
- Ode to Morning Sickness by Carrie Snyder "Morning sickness, like teacup rides, spinning 'round my insides!" — Carrie Snyder
- My Utterly Unscientific Guide to Pregnancy by Pamela Redmond Satran "Craving ice cream at three, pregnancy makes a foodie out of me!" — Pamela Redmond Satran
- The Expectant One by Dorothy Parker "Glowing with advice so free, oh, the joy of pregnancy!" — Dorothy Parker
Funny mom quotes can provide the right amount of humor and insight into the quirks of pregnancy, making your poem not just creative but also highly relatable and enjoyable.
Conclusion
Pregnancy is an incredible journey filled with a rollercoaster of emotions, from sheer joy to moments of utter disbelief. Funny pregnancy quotes offer a lighthearted perspective, reminding us to embrace the humor amidst the chaos. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, and these witty one-liners are sure to bring a smile to any expectant mother's face.
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Frequently Asked Questions
What Is A Cool Quote About Pregnancy?
"Pregnancy is a beautiful, amazing journey – and also a total mind-bender." — Unknown
"The only time you can pee on a stick and there's a party afterward." — Unknown
"Pregnancy is the only time in life when you'll fall in love with someone you haven't met." — Unknown
What Are The Funny Pregnancy Captions On Instagram?
"I'm growing a tiny human. What's your superpower?"— Unknown
"Does this baby make me look fat?"— Unknown
"We decided we’re not going to have children. We’re going to have a baby instead." — Unknown
What Is A Short Quote For An Unborn Baby?
"Little tiny heartbeat, big dreams ahead." — Unknown
"The greatest gift is the one you cannot see." — Unknown
"A tiny human, a whole new adventure." — Unknown
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Thomas Turner | View all blog posts
Thomas Turner is an SEO Content Writer at Sandjest where he develops and implements content strategies to enhance online visibility and drive organic traffic. With a Bachelor’s degree in Communications from Northwestern University and five years of experience in the marketing and content writing field. In his spare time, Thomas enjoys playing badminton and chess, activities that help him stay active and sharpen his strategic thinking skills.